It Was You...

Every night I fall asleep wishing he were still mine. And I talk about him so much because he's all I've known for so long. How do I get over him? I don't? Do I just go on and live through it. I doubt there will be anyone who will have my heart as much as he does. He has me completely, wholey. He knows everything about me. More than I know about myself and that's what scares me and confuses me. How dare he let me go? I'm furious with him. Now, he wants to see me...but I can't give that to him. Not now. It's impossible. I want to live again; for myself. I want to be ok without him, but I can't be. I just can't.

And I'm trying my best to just say goodbye to him because everything is wrong. Nothing about us is ok anymore. In fact, he doesn't even realize how much I'm hurting. And I think he wants to fix it. He just doesn't know how. And I think it's best if we just move on. We have to. I love him with all my heart, but I can't stay in this place forever. I have to move on. I have to love someone else. Although, I'll never be this happy again. I have to try. I love him so much. If you've never known perfection, you'll never understand. Even though he hurt me and even though I hurt him, it was him that made me happy. He was my best and my worst. He was everything. I love to just hear him say my name. I love him to say hello. I hate him to say goodbye. I hate that we will never be husband and wife after everything we've been through. I hate that some other woman will get what I worked so hard for. That some other woman will get my happily ever after. How dare she? How could life be so cruel to me. It's my fault. I know. But I love him. Can't love overrule everything else? Why can't it? I hate this. I love him. I want him, but it's best like this (that was more for me than for you).

I'm typing through my hurt right now. Listening to Emily Kings' "It Was You". So close to tears I'm crying. I love him. I do. I love him so much. I want to be in his arms right now. I want him to hold me and tell me everything is going to be ok. Tell me he loves me, kiss me on my forehead and let me fall asleep right there. Why can't I? I miss him. I love him. I want him here. I want to be there. I want us together. :-(

Well...

Later kids

Love.Live.Music

mwa.

It Was You
Right now to the way we were...so in love but life soon brings change.
Through ones eyes. He cried tears for me, but by his side I can no longer be.
We used to talk all night, of different things but you, you didn't hear me cry. Our love is ending. Somewhere between the lines, there's sadness I could no longer had.

It was you who brought the sunlight back in my life, it was you. It was you who promised me forever that things would be right. It was you who made me cry. Now to you I say goodbye. Through the lies and the truth it was you.

So now my love goodbye...I'll miss you though you've gone. But leaves do changes as time goes on. And though we've parted in the end....for all the time spent in love. I thank you.